Ps. 4 – 7 prayers to help you love the unlovable

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She was angry and had every right to be.

I listened through the phone as she told me that a friend had turned on her – even threatening her.

We agreed that prayer was the best course of action, and we prayed together right then and there. But after I hung up, I realized I hadn’t prayed as fervently for this newly-declared enemy as I could have. My prayers had focused on my maligned friend and her family.

David had his fair share of enemies. It didn’t matter how powerful he became, David was continually surrounded by disloyal family and pretending friends. Early in his career, he walked on eggshells in King Saul’s court. As the most powerful man in Israel, he squirreled away many months on country hillsides running from his son, Absalom.

On this Day of Love, we are often reminded of Jesus’ imperative to love our enemies in Matt. 5:44-47 but are often left wondering how to do so. What does love for an enemy look like?

In Ps. 4, David offers some tangible ways we can love those who are pursuing us with malicious intent – all through prayer.

Some scholars believe the background of Ps. 4 is a failed attack by Absalom’s men, who fell back to wait for a more appropriate time to strike at the king.

“Hear me when I call, O God of my righteousness!
You have relieved me in my distress;
Have mercy on me, and hear my prayer.” Ps. 4:1

On this particular evening, David might have been preparing himself for sleep with the knowledge that his enemies are also bedding down for their night. And while his enemies were turning in instead of turning out on the battlefield, David challenges them with a prayer filled with seven imperatives.  

“How long, O you sons of men,
Will you turn my glory to shame?
How long will you love worthlessness
And seek falsehood? Selah” Ps. 4:2

Regardless of the enemy you face, these would make powerful prayers for those individuals for whom we don’t know how to pray passionately.

“But know that the Lord has set apart for Himself him who is godly;
The Lord will hear when I call to Him.” Ps. 4:3

David prays that his enemies might know God through his people. God’s people – those whom he has set apart – are called the friends of God. Far from a threat, David prays that his enemies might fall back from the dangerous position of trespassing against God’s anointed.

 

“Tremble and do not sin; when you are on your beds, search your hearts and be silent.” Ps. 4:4

Ultimately, David prays that his enemies will reflect on the sinful motivations of their heart through the prism of God’s Word.[1] They are to tremble in light of who God is.

 “Tremble and do not sin; when you are on your beds, search your hearts and be silent.” Ps. 4:4

David prays his enemies will turn from their sin. Simple enough, but hard to do. Thankfully, we have a God who is the Conqueror of sin.

“Tremble and do not sin; when you are on your beds, search your hearts and be silent.” Ps. 4:4

The NKJV translates “search your hearts” as “meditate within your heart.”  It conveys the sense of “speak to your hearts” and “signifies thinking and planning.”[2]

David prays his enemies plans will be confined to their hearts – rather than expressed to others in a public setting.

“Tremble and do not sin; when you are on your beds, search your hearts and be silent.” Ps. 4:4

 “Be silent” has the sense of “keeping still like a stone.” (Exod 15:16). But because the verb is parallel with “tremble” (or NIV, “in your anger”), commentators believe David is praying that his opponents will “wail” over their sin against him and against the Lord.[3]

“Offer the sacrifices of the righteous and trust in the Lord.” Ps. 4:5

David prays his enemies will enter into authentic worship by repenting of their sin. 

In the Old Testament, authentic worship looked like righteous sacrifices motivated by repentance. Today, we have a better sacrifice in Christ, but we are still encouraged to repent and trust. When we do so, we cannot help but give our lives over as a living sacrifice.

“Offer the sacrifices of the righteous and trust in the Lord.” Ps. 4:5

David is praying for his enemies to set aside all the things that are driving their hearts to act against him – fear, pride, anger, selfishness – and to orient their hearts toward God instead.

David knew a lot about enemies – especially those who claimed allegiance only to pull the rug out from under him later.

But David also knew a lot about trust. Listen to how he closes Ps. 4:

“Many, Lord, are asking, “Who will bring us prosperity?”
    Let the light of your face shine on us.
Fill my heart with joy
    when their grain and new wine abound.

 In peace I will lie down and sleep,
    for you alone, Lord,
    make me dwell in safety.” Ps. 4:6-8

Are you trying to walk in love towards someone who is proving to be unlovable? The next time you talk to God about them, consider using Ps. 4 as your divine prayer points.

Ask God to open their eyes and hearts so they might know him and his people, reflect on their motivations, regard their sin, search their heart, wail against their unholiness, offer up their lives as a sacrifice, and place their trust in Him.